June 11, 2009

Inside Out

"Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself."
-Og Mandino

Day in and day out we are bombarded with images that tell us with 'just this' we could be happier, thinner, smarter, sexier, etc. Sometimes we rush out or pick up the phone to by such things. But it is a lie. There is no cream that heals inner hurt. There's no pill that will patch together a broken soul. There is only ourselves.

There was a turning point in my life when relationships opened up to me and I realized I had been thinking about them in the wrong way. It was my freshman year at college in my Intro To Communications class. We were discussing feelings. How do feeling appear? Can someone make you feel something? Can you make someone feel something? I said that feelings are an expression of the soul and that you can make someone feel something, sometimes it's not what you want, but you can. He said I was wrong. Flat out wrong. I was so set back that my jaw dropped. He told me to think about these two situations:

You are sitting at a coffee house with your friends talking politics... you say something to your best friend and she says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel? Do you take her seriously? Probably not. You are friends, it's what you do.

Now, you are in a clothing store. You turn and accidentally bump in to someone, both of your purchases hit the ground. You start apologising profusely and the guy says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel then? Do you take him seriously? Probably. Because the situations are different, or because you are different?

It's a great idea to ponder, no one can MAKE you feel anything. You ALLOW them to make you feel the way you do. It is fantastically liberating feeling when you can see how you feel and then judge your reactions based on it. No more flying off the handle or letting someone hurt you for no reason. And you can use this to change someone else's life.

Smile and eye contact. The grumpier the person looks on the street, look them right in the eye, give them a sincere smile and say "Good Morning!". They don't have to reply, they don't even have to smile back. But it will get them thinking, and smiles are contagious.

Have A Blessed Day.

Brandy

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