I had always mistakenly believed that if I had more money. I would have a better plan for creating wealth. The truth is that if I had a better plan, I would have more money.
You see, it's not the amount that counts; it's the plan that counts. It's not how much you allocate but how you allocate it.
-Jim Rohn
I have to say that of all the plans I have had to get more money, I had never really had a plan to build wealth. Nest eggs, college funds, retirement plans and rainy day funds I have, but never really put much though into a wealth plan. It is now on my 'To-Do' list.
Just in case you are wondering what the difference between having lots of money and having wealth is, here's a quick explanation. Money is simply the cash that you have coming in or stashed. You can have a ton of money and have no wealth (I know a person who has an income of over 2.7 million dollars a year and their net worth is -1.2 million, oi!), the money just goes as fast as it comes in. To have wealth you must have significant assets (cash reserves, property, investments, etc) over any debt you may have (also know someone who only made 37k a year, but has a net worth of approx. 800 thousand). So it's not how much you make, it's how it gets spent.
Ever know someone who is very successful, without having to spend 100 hours a week on work? Those people have a plan. If you know how to work smart and efficiently, then you get way more done in less time. It takes a plan. You must think out what you are doing for today, this week, this month and this year. You must see how actions you do during that 1 year plan affect your 5 year plan. What's that? You don't have a 5 year plan? Well then it is really time to sit down and think about what you want your life to look like in 5 years. Build a plan.
Life can either be what happens to you, or it can be what you make happen. Some people are happy with letting life happen to them, or they are just not unhappy enough to do something about it. It's their choice, and no one can change it but themselves. But if you are a person who wants to make life happen, you must have a plan. Without plans, who knows what you're going to end up with?
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
Showing posts with label control. Show all posts
Showing posts with label control. Show all posts
April 19, 2010
February 24, 2010
The 1 Ton Phone
If we're growing, we're always going to be out of our comfort zone.
-John Maxwell
The fear of the phone is so very common amongst business owners. There is no shame in knowing that you KNOW you have to make calls to get business, yet you avoid the phone like it's got the plague. We all understand, we have all done it.
I was having a conversation with a friend of mine who was saying how they only had a couple of customers that month and didn't want to spend a lot of money on an advertising campaign. She then asked me what I would do. I said I'd get on the phone, start calling people, see what's going on. She said she hated doing that and was going to run the ad campaign... Oh well.
Referrals can be the life blood of your business, but how do you get one and from who?
The people who give you referrals are the ones who know and like you. Lots of business owners put their social lives on hold in order to advance their business. It is a huge mistake. How can you get to know new people and have those you know like you, if they never get to spend time with you? The solution is to call them. Don't call to talk shop, call to see what's going on in their lives, call to see if there is anything you can help them with. Do they have a fundraiser going on? Any special events for their kids? I'm telling you from both a parent and a business owner's point of view, buying a few chocolate bars or an $8 roll of wrapping paper goes a long, long way in developing relationships!
Want to call people but have no idea what to say? Try keeping a log. Just a few notes on what's going on with them. See if they are on Facebook or Twitter, it will give you a better idea of what to talk to them about. In the log try to keep track of kids, pets, spouses, any issues they may be having. If they mention in January that Jane is working on her final project for graduation in June, that gives you a great reason to call back in June!!
If you need to set appointments for presentations? This is BY FAR the hardest reason on why you need to call people. Calling someone out of the blue, or even someone you know well and putting yourself out there opens a huge door on our self-esteem. There's lots of outcomes and I think I've heard them all. From rude, to excited, to unwilling to can't wait, you never know what's going to happen on the other end of that phone. But it MUST, MUST, MUST be done. Try working out different approaches, some people wouldn't' listen for a second if they thought you were trying to sell them something, but if they thought they were listening as a favor to you or to see if they know someone, it can be a different story. Try and figure out what approach would work for them and if nothing else, just try, try, try again.
Using the phone to build your business is like any other tool or skill you need to be effective. I don't think any of us were born with a great ability to set appointments, get referrals or build relationships. We have to practice at it. Start small, try 5 phone calls a day. Just keep working at it. Like all other skills, it will grow with time, and soon you will be great at it!
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-John Maxwell
The fear of the phone is so very common amongst business owners. There is no shame in knowing that you KNOW you have to make calls to get business, yet you avoid the phone like it's got the plague. We all understand, we have all done it.
I was having a conversation with a friend of mine who was saying how they only had a couple of customers that month and didn't want to spend a lot of money on an advertising campaign. She then asked me what I would do. I said I'd get on the phone, start calling people, see what's going on. She said she hated doing that and was going to run the ad campaign... Oh well.
Referrals can be the life blood of your business, but how do you get one and from who?
The people who give you referrals are the ones who know and like you. Lots of business owners put their social lives on hold in order to advance their business. It is a huge mistake. How can you get to know new people and have those you know like you, if they never get to spend time with you? The solution is to call them. Don't call to talk shop, call to see what's going on in their lives, call to see if there is anything you can help them with. Do they have a fundraiser going on? Any special events for their kids? I'm telling you from both a parent and a business owner's point of view, buying a few chocolate bars or an $8 roll of wrapping paper goes a long, long way in developing relationships!
Want to call people but have no idea what to say? Try keeping a log. Just a few notes on what's going on with them. See if they are on Facebook or Twitter, it will give you a better idea of what to talk to them about. In the log try to keep track of kids, pets, spouses, any issues they may be having. If they mention in January that Jane is working on her final project for graduation in June, that gives you a great reason to call back in June!!
If you need to set appointments for presentations? This is BY FAR the hardest reason on why you need to call people. Calling someone out of the blue, or even someone you know well and putting yourself out there opens a huge door on our self-esteem. There's lots of outcomes and I think I've heard them all. From rude, to excited, to unwilling to can't wait, you never know what's going to happen on the other end of that phone. But it MUST, MUST, MUST be done. Try working out different approaches, some people wouldn't' listen for a second if they thought you were trying to sell them something, but if they thought they were listening as a favor to you or to see if they know someone, it can be a different story. Try and figure out what approach would work for them and if nothing else, just try, try, try again.
Using the phone to build your business is like any other tool or skill you need to be effective. I don't think any of us were born with a great ability to set appointments, get referrals or build relationships. We have to practice at it. Start small, try 5 phone calls a day. Just keep working at it. Like all other skills, it will grow with time, and soon you will be great at it!
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
November 4, 2009
The Myth of Spare Time
We should use time as a tool, not a crutch.
How many times do we hear 'in your spare time' over the course of a month? Personally, I get sick of hearing it. 'You can build a business in your spare time.' 'Volunteer in your spare time.' 'What do you do in your spare time?' Spare time? When did we get 25 hours in a day? Did someone add in a Someday to the week? No, no they did not.
Trying to find that time you need to work out, spend time with your kids and/or build a business is a chore in and of itself. There is no way of 'creating' extra time. We only have 24 hours in a day and like most of our paychecks, it's spent before we even get there. So how do we make time?
You have to start by knowing how you spend your time. How much time do you spend doing your hair and putting on make-up in the morning? Picking out clothes? Checking email and following up with your friends on Facebook? There's a lot of little things we spend our time on. Try keeping a log of what you do. You can't really fix anything until you know what is wrong with it. Are there any repetitive tasks that you can group together, like checking your email at lunch so you don't have to spend 45 minutes on it when you get home? Are you waisting time looking at sales ads for things you don't need? Once you actually look at what you spend time on, you can start looking at where to find some. Here are a few tips on finding an extra hour or two in your week:
1. Books on Tape/MP3: Many of us have books to read for school, personal development or training. Many of these are available in audio format. Check the publisher's website or your school's library. It is often cheaper to record books onto audio then to have them printed in braille, so school's pay students to record the books. Listen to the recordings in the car or during your work out to save your reading time for other uses.
2. Many Hands Make Light Work: Is there anything that you can get help on? Give your kids a night that they have to cook, this can save you time and make them feel part of the family. See if your friends want to help on craft projects for the holidays. You can work on it together and get more done, plus you spend time together so there's some time back! Never be afraid to ask for help. Are you doing all the chores? Time to ask your partner to help with some, you shouldn't have to do it all yourself.
3. Hair, Make-Up and Clothes: Talk to a stylist. There are lots of ways to reconfigure your wardrobe so that everything goes together. A little bit of careful shopping at the beginning can save you that 20 minutes of "What am I going to wear today?!". A stylist can also help you simplify your make-up and hair-do. There is no need to go into a two hour hair and make-up session every day before work, do some research on different products and styles. Somewhere in the mix you can find one that can get you out the door in under 45 minutes.
4. Email and Social Networks: Set up filters for your not-quite-junk items. Everything from Facebook goes into it's own folder, Twitter another, Sale alerts in another. It is pretty simple to do, and then when you go to check your email, you don't have to sort through all that junk to see if someone really does need your attention. Same thing with your social networks. Almost all have lists that can be used to sort through which of your friends and family are sharing. By knowing where to go for the updates that you want to look at, you don't waste time on a lot of junk.
5. Games: I am a HUGE fan of games. I love them all. But I do get sucked into them. You start playing around and before you know it an hour and a half has gone by and you can't even remember why you booted up your computer to begin with. Try getting a timer next to your computer. Set a limit and stick to it. (30 min is usually pretty good)
I hope some or all of these can help you find an extra 5-10 hours in your week. We all get going at lighting speed, end up at the end of the day exhausted and not quite sure what we got done. A little bit of foresight, planning and some professional assistance can make the world of difference in how you spend your hours. Because unlike money, once time is spent, we really can't get it back.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-John F. Kennedy
How many times do we hear 'in your spare time' over the course of a month? Personally, I get sick of hearing it. 'You can build a business in your spare time.' 'Volunteer in your spare time.' 'What do you do in your spare time?' Spare time? When did we get 25 hours in a day? Did someone add in a Someday to the week? No, no they did not.
Trying to find that time you need to work out, spend time with your kids and/or build a business is a chore in and of itself. There is no way of 'creating' extra time. We only have 24 hours in a day and like most of our paychecks, it's spent before we even get there. So how do we make time?
You have to start by knowing how you spend your time. How much time do you spend doing your hair and putting on make-up in the morning? Picking out clothes? Checking email and following up with your friends on Facebook? There's a lot of little things we spend our time on. Try keeping a log of what you do. You can't really fix anything until you know what is wrong with it. Are there any repetitive tasks that you can group together, like checking your email at lunch so you don't have to spend 45 minutes on it when you get home? Are you waisting time looking at sales ads for things you don't need? Once you actually look at what you spend time on, you can start looking at where to find some. Here are a few tips on finding an extra hour or two in your week:
1. Books on Tape/MP3: Many of us have books to read for school, personal development or training. Many of these are available in audio format. Check the publisher's website or your school's library. It is often cheaper to record books onto audio then to have them printed in braille, so school's pay students to record the books. Listen to the recordings in the car or during your work out to save your reading time for other uses.
2. Many Hands Make Light Work: Is there anything that you can get help on? Give your kids a night that they have to cook, this can save you time and make them feel part of the family. See if your friends want to help on craft projects for the holidays. You can work on it together and get more done, plus you spend time together so there's some time back! Never be afraid to ask for help. Are you doing all the chores? Time to ask your partner to help with some, you shouldn't have to do it all yourself.
3. Hair, Make-Up and Clothes: Talk to a stylist. There are lots of ways to reconfigure your wardrobe so that everything goes together. A little bit of careful shopping at the beginning can save you that 20 minutes of "What am I going to wear today?!". A stylist can also help you simplify your make-up and hair-do. There is no need to go into a two hour hair and make-up session every day before work, do some research on different products and styles. Somewhere in the mix you can find one that can get you out the door in under 45 minutes.
4. Email and Social Networks: Set up filters for your not-quite-junk items. Everything from Facebook goes into it's own folder, Twitter another, Sale alerts in another. It is pretty simple to do, and then when you go to check your email, you don't have to sort through all that junk to see if someone really does need your attention. Same thing with your social networks. Almost all have lists that can be used to sort through which of your friends and family are sharing. By knowing where to go for the updates that you want to look at, you don't waste time on a lot of junk.
5. Games: I am a HUGE fan of games. I love them all. But I do get sucked into them. You start playing around and before you know it an hour and a half has gone by and you can't even remember why you booted up your computer to begin with. Try getting a timer next to your computer. Set a limit and stick to it. (30 min is usually pretty good)
I hope some or all of these can help you find an extra 5-10 hours in your week. We all get going at lighting speed, end up at the end of the day exhausted and not quite sure what we got done. A little bit of foresight, planning and some professional assistance can make the world of difference in how you spend your hours. Because unlike money, once time is spent, we really can't get it back.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
August 3, 2009
Accepting Life. No returns, no refunds.
Each one of us is given a life. That life is like a block of wood waiting to be carved. Everything that happens, good and bad, takes a small shaving off. We don't know what we end up with, but must accept the shape that it takes.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-Me
When things go terribly, horribly wrong in our lives, we have a habit of asking "Why me?". Knowing that we didn't deserve something this bad to happen. We've done good, we volunteer, we help our neighbors, pay our taxes, so why do bad things happen to good people?
The shaping of character comes from not only the good things in life, but also the bad. But I only know of a hand full of people that will stop when everything is well and ask "Why me?". There's a lot more people out there who only find faith, hope and strength in times of need. Only when in a desperate hour to they call on friends and family. We tend to ignore life when it is good and curse it when it is bad. This all occurred to me about 3 weeks ago listening to the Travis Smiley (i think) show on NPR. I just caught a few moments of it, he had said "At the end of each and every day, we must ask ourselves 'What's the lessin and what's the blessin?'." The 'each day' struck me.
I realized that I had become really good at looking at the not-so-great moments of my life and picking the positive out, then moving on. Finding that diamond in a dung hill and letting the other crap go. But what about my good days? Was I seeking out positive reinforcement on those days? Was I reading my motivational books then? Not really. I was waiting until things started to go awry until I sought out an uplifting message.
This all reverted me back to Deep Practice. We must be thankful at the end of each day. Good and bad. We must practice on our good days to be thankful so that on our bad days it comes to us easier. We need to stop looking to the Heaven's asking "Why me?". We need to look to the Heaven's and say "Thank You." and then look within and say "Why not me?"
When the truly tragic happens, would you be willing to push all that sorrow onto someone else? Would you be willing to crush a complete stranger's life to make your's easier? I thought about these questions for a long, long time. And I say No. Even though I would love to have my friends, family and loved ones back. I would not give up the hurt and sorrow that filled me when they passed. It shaped me. Everything I have ever done has shaped me, and if I gave or pushed out any of the good or the bad things that had happened I wouldn't be me. And that would be a tragedy in and of itself.
Enjoy life, enjoy each other. Accept what you have been given, be thank full for the good and the bad. We should not presume to know what life lessons are in store for us, or how they will shape them. Just know that one step at a time, one breath at a time, we get through this life, together.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
July 15, 2009
ch-ch-ch-choices
The first step to getting the tings you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.
Everyday we make hundreds of decisions. Some we are so well trained to do, we don't really think about them. We choose to get out of bed, eat breakfast, go to work, what we wear, what route to take, etc., etc, etc.
Some will say, 'But you don't choose to eat, you have to eat.' not true. You don't have to eat, ask Ghandi. But if you don't eat, you die. So congratulations, you chose life! On a less dramatic scale you do get to choose what to eat. You can have a hamburger, or you can have a chicken burger. We have to rethink how we think to make changes and changes start with choices.
If you are one of the millions of people who have found themselves let-go from your place of work and are reading this. I know you are thinking that you didn't choose to get fired or laid off. Using our ability to choose is a way to react to other people's choices as well. You don't have a job, that is a fact, you cannot make your boss change their mind, so move on. You can choose to sit around and feel sorry for yourself. You can go out and apply for a few jobs a day and that's that. OR you can make active choices to regain employment. OR start your own business. We all have a skill set. Big or small. They can all be used to our advantage or disadvantage. You can clean? Send out and email and call around to see if anyone needs help cleaning their house or garage. It may not be much money, but money is money. Use your skills to earn extra $$$ while waiting for a job to come along. Doing something is better then doing nothing.
For those who are looking for a job, here are some tips:
*Keep a written record of where you have applied
*Make sure you keep track of who you've contacted at potential employers
*Follow up at least once a week, by phone, on those applications
*Make sure you know the name of who will make the decision to hire you
*Be well informed about the company going into your interview
*Try to get information on who is interviewing you (google them)
*Follow up with a Thank You Card or Handwritten Note
*Follow up by phone once a week until you get a yes or no answer
*Repeat as often as you can until you get a job.
For those who are sick of looking for a job and want long term security:
*Call or email me, I can help you find or build a business that will put YOU in charge.
Just remember today that life is all about choices. You can choose life, love, healthiness and happiness. We choose how to react to situations. We choose what to put into our bodies. We choose to spend time with our family. Use your choices wisely.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-Ben Stein
Everyday we make hundreds of decisions. Some we are so well trained to do, we don't really think about them. We choose to get out of bed, eat breakfast, go to work, what we wear, what route to take, etc., etc, etc.
Some will say, 'But you don't choose to eat, you have to eat.' not true. You don't have to eat, ask Ghandi. But if you don't eat, you die. So congratulations, you chose life! On a less dramatic scale you do get to choose what to eat. You can have a hamburger, or you can have a chicken burger. We have to rethink how we think to make changes and changes start with choices.
If you are one of the millions of people who have found themselves let-go from your place of work and are reading this. I know you are thinking that you didn't choose to get fired or laid off. Using our ability to choose is a way to react to other people's choices as well. You don't have a job, that is a fact, you cannot make your boss change their mind, so move on. You can choose to sit around and feel sorry for yourself. You can go out and apply for a few jobs a day and that's that. OR you can make active choices to regain employment. OR start your own business. We all have a skill set. Big or small. They can all be used to our advantage or disadvantage. You can clean? Send out and email and call around to see if anyone needs help cleaning their house or garage. It may not be much money, but money is money. Use your skills to earn extra $$$ while waiting for a job to come along. Doing something is better then doing nothing.
For those who are looking for a job, here are some tips:
*Keep a written record of where you have applied
*Make sure you keep track of who you've contacted at potential employers
*Follow up at least once a week, by phone, on those applications
*Make sure you know the name of who will make the decision to hire you
*Be well informed about the company going into your interview
*Try to get information on who is interviewing you (google them)
*Follow up with a Thank You Card or Handwritten Note
*Follow up by phone once a week until you get a yes or no answer
*Repeat as often as you can until you get a job.
For those who are sick of looking for a job and want long term security:
*Call or email me, I can help you find or build a business that will put YOU in charge.
Just remember today that life is all about choices. You can choose life, love, healthiness and happiness. We choose how to react to situations. We choose what to put into our bodies. We choose to spend time with our family. Use your choices wisely.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
July 8, 2009
Loosing Weight
Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.
In the last year I've gone from 225 to 175 (now back up to 185, stupid not smoking). That's not hype or photo-shopped pictures. That's 12 months of eating light yogurt instead of ice cream, working out instead of going to the movies, being sore and really enjoying working towards a goal.
We are bombarded day in and day out with the possibilities of miracles. Are we living in a magical new world? Can money and a few pills solve our problems? Are there more miracles today, or are we just broadcasting them more? All good questions to ask. I believe in miracles, absolutely. I believe in faith, love and human determination. All this helped push me through that 50 pounds and will continue pushing me through the next 25.
I have listened to a lot of people tell me that they've tried everything to loose weight... then proceeded to tell me that they ate the double whopper at Burger King (but held the cheese!). There are many, many factors in loosing weight, and not every program works for everyone. I chose simple. Diet and exercise. I watch my portions, eat WLF (whole grain, lean meats and fresh foods) and work out like a maniac (4-7x a week between 20min-2hrs). Not everyone can afford the money and time it takes to do this, but you can implement some changes.
Try the +10 a week. Start with 10 push ups, sit ups, dips, jumping jacks, squats, lunges and planks (all three hold for 10 seconds). Then the next week add 10, 20 push ups, sit ups, dips, etc. Do them M-W-F right before your shower, then add in a Tues. or a Saturday. Pretty soon you'll be doing it everyday. Promise yourself that whatever changes you want to commit for a year. If at 2 months, 6 months, 8 months you're not 'feeling' it, keep going. Take a photo of yourself today then look at another one (in the same clothes) in a year. You'll see a difference if you commit to yourself!
This way of acting and committing works for all aspects of life. If you commit a little bit of time every day to reaching a goal, you will. But it's not easy, it's not fast and it's not painless. Everything worth having is worth working for. Commit to YOU!
If you need a personal coach at an affordable rate, let me know. I can direct you to a few, just drop me an email.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-Reggie Leach
In the last year I've gone from 225 to 175 (now back up to 185, stupid not smoking). That's not hype or photo-shopped pictures. That's 12 months of eating light yogurt instead of ice cream, working out instead of going to the movies, being sore and really enjoying working towards a goal.
We are bombarded day in and day out with the possibilities of miracles. Are we living in a magical new world? Can money and a few pills solve our problems? Are there more miracles today, or are we just broadcasting them more? All good questions to ask. I believe in miracles, absolutely. I believe in faith, love and human determination. All this helped push me through that 50 pounds and will continue pushing me through the next 25.
I have listened to a lot of people tell me that they've tried everything to loose weight... then proceeded to tell me that they ate the double whopper at Burger King (but held the cheese!). There are many, many factors in loosing weight, and not every program works for everyone. I chose simple. Diet and exercise. I watch my portions, eat WLF (whole grain, lean meats and fresh foods) and work out like a maniac (4-7x a week between 20min-2hrs). Not everyone can afford the money and time it takes to do this, but you can implement some changes.
Try the +10 a week. Start with 10 push ups, sit ups, dips, jumping jacks, squats, lunges and planks (all three hold for 10 seconds). Then the next week add 10, 20 push ups, sit ups, dips, etc. Do them M-W-F right before your shower, then add in a Tues. or a Saturday. Pretty soon you'll be doing it everyday. Promise yourself that whatever changes you want to commit for a year. If at 2 months, 6 months, 8 months you're not 'feeling' it, keep going. Take a photo of yourself today then look at another one (in the same clothes) in a year. You'll see a difference if you commit to yourself!
This way of acting and committing works for all aspects of life. If you commit a little bit of time every day to reaching a goal, you will. But it's not easy, it's not fast and it's not painless. Everything worth having is worth working for. Commit to YOU!
If you need a personal coach at an affordable rate, let me know. I can direct you to a few, just drop me an email.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
July 7, 2009
Shooda, Cooda, Wooda Sisters
Acceptance doesn't mean that you have to agree with something and like how it is. Acceptance simply means that you accept how it is and make peace with it.
-Mike Robbins
I'm not exactly sure when I heard the story, but it has stuck with me for years and held true... DON'T SPEND TIME WITH THE SHOODA, COODA, WOODA SISTERS!!
The Shooda sister always should have done something. I should have left five minutes earlier, I wouldn't have gotten stuck in traffic [you may have missed traffic but you may have ended up in the accident also]. .I should have called Mary first, then she wouldn't have signed up with Ken. [when we don't want to do something, and it turned out to be the right thing, we can be too hard on ourselves] I should get up earlier to get a head start on the day [don't just say you're going to do something, do it] Shooda constantly focuses in on what she 'should have' done instead of what she can and is doing. She is poor company.
The Cooda sister always could have done something. I could have taken I-90 and saved myself the hour wait [but you didn't and waisted an hour whining about it]. I could have done a better report, then I would have that raise [but you sped through yours to get of work an hour early to see your kids play]. I could have made that call, but I didn't want to get stuck on the phone while I was making dinner [excuses!] . Cooda constantly focuses on what she 'could have' done making excuses and beating herself up about her priorities. Being in her company makes you feel guilty.
The Wooda sister always would have done something, her stars never quite align right. I would have taken I-5, but it looked too crowded. [looks can be deceiving] I would have stayed late to finish it, but I didn't think the boss would be in early. [it's only cheating if you get caught?] I would have called Suzy, if I had known that she was looking for a home based business [never know until you ask]. Wooda constantly sees a better way that she 'would have' done something if something else wasn't there, if something else wasn't going on, if there was something she would have known. Too much hanging with Wooda and you may be upset or depressed, but at least it won't ever be your fault.
We have all spent at least a little bit of time (some of us a lot of time) with one or all three of the sisters. We need to not beat ourselves up, make excuses for or deflect the reasons why we make the choices we make. If something is not working, take a closer look at what you did, and do it better next time.
Accept that what has happened, happened. Accept that you had a part (big or small) in the events that happened. Identify what created the good results (or the bad). Learn from them, repeat the good, change the bad. AND MOVE FORWARD!
Only dedicate a small part of your day to this, maybe 15-30 minutes at the end of your day. Focus on the good things that happened, not the bad. And know that tomorrow you'll add another tool to your mental toolbox for positive results!
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
June 23, 2009
CH-ch-ch-changes
"In the end, everybody knows what the goal is and how to achieve it. This is common knowledge, and it's been around for a long, long time. Success is about knowing these things and having the will to go after them without giving up, making excuses, or getting sidetracked. It's about the uncommon application of common knowledge."
-Dr. Ivan Misner
We all have a habit we'd like to kick or a little something about ourselves that we would like to change. Have you ever been struck by that 'Ah-ha!" moment when you realize exactly what you need to do to change it? Do you know how to change it, but just can't seem to do it? It's OK we have all been there, like watching our lives from the outside. Seeing ourselves do these not so great things, knowing that we are better then this, but just seeming like we can't do anything about it.
I have gone through my fair share of not so good habits. Being obese, compulsive eating, drugs, smoking, nail biting and a not so good mother. It's not that I woke up one morning and was a think, non-smoking, grade-a mom. It takes time to dissolve old habits. Lots of time, will power, support and tears. I didn't even quit smoking until this last week. That means that I have been dumping bad habits for the last 9 years. And the work is never done...
Let me tell you a story.. when I was in 8th grade we did an experiment. The teacher had asked if anyone knew origami (having learned how to make a 'ball' in 4th grade, I raised my hand), I then stood up in front of the class and showed over and over again how to make the ball. Then the teacher split us into two groups, and gave us 3 minutes to make as many balls as possible. Pitted us against each other. And both sides numbers grew. After 3 rounds we were making twice as many as we started. The teacher uses this as a business lesson in motivation and constant improvement. By pitting different shifts against each other, you can cause a competitive reaction to make the shifts do better and improve a little more each time. Constant improvement is still with me today. Thank you to my 8th grade Teacher, though for the life of me I can't remember his name.
We just have to remember that when we make a big change in our life, to take small steps, reward ourselves. Try to make tomorrow a little better then today. And if we should stumble or fall in our task. Not to get too upset, not to chastise and speak poorly of ourselves. To get up and try again. Because we are doing something, we have stopped just talking about doing and started doing. For that you should reward yourself.
Yes, I have lost 50 lb, I am drug-free and I am a non-smoker. It's a long, hard road back from these places, but together we can walk through it. You can be the person you see yourself as being. Just map out the road to get there and put one foot in front of the other. I believe in you.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
-Dr. Ivan Misner
We all have a habit we'd like to kick or a little something about ourselves that we would like to change. Have you ever been struck by that 'Ah-ha!" moment when you realize exactly what you need to do to change it? Do you know how to change it, but just can't seem to do it? It's OK we have all been there, like watching our lives from the outside. Seeing ourselves do these not so great things, knowing that we are better then this, but just seeming like we can't do anything about it.
I have gone through my fair share of not so good habits. Being obese, compulsive eating, drugs, smoking, nail biting and a not so good mother. It's not that I woke up one morning and was a think, non-smoking, grade-a mom. It takes time to dissolve old habits. Lots of time, will power, support and tears. I didn't even quit smoking until this last week. That means that I have been dumping bad habits for the last 9 years. And the work is never done...
Let me tell you a story.. when I was in 8th grade we did an experiment. The teacher had asked if anyone knew origami (having learned how to make a 'ball' in 4th grade, I raised my hand), I then stood up in front of the class and showed over and over again how to make the ball. Then the teacher split us into two groups, and gave us 3 minutes to make as many balls as possible. Pitted us against each other. And both sides numbers grew. After 3 rounds we were making twice as many as we started. The teacher uses this as a business lesson in motivation and constant improvement. By pitting different shifts against each other, you can cause a competitive reaction to make the shifts do better and improve a little more each time. Constant improvement is still with me today. Thank you to my 8th grade Teacher, though for the life of me I can't remember his name.
We just have to remember that when we make a big change in our life, to take small steps, reward ourselves. Try to make tomorrow a little better then today. And if we should stumble or fall in our task. Not to get too upset, not to chastise and speak poorly of ourselves. To get up and try again. Because we are doing something, we have stopped just talking about doing and started doing. For that you should reward yourself.
Yes, I have lost 50 lb, I am drug-free and I am a non-smoker. It's a long, hard road back from these places, but together we can walk through it. You can be the person you see yourself as being. Just map out the road to get there and put one foot in front of the other. I believe in you.
Have a Blessed Day,
Brandy Deming
CelticBlessings4U@Gmail.com
http://www.womenswealthandwellness.com/celticblessings
http://www.twitter.com/brandysbiz
June 11, 2009
Inside Out
"Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself."
-Og Mandino
Day in and day out we are bombarded with images that tell us with 'just this' we could be happier, thinner, smarter, sexier, etc. Sometimes we rush out or pick up the phone to by such things. But it is a lie. There is no cream that heals inner hurt. There's no pill that will patch together a broken soul. There is only ourselves.
There was a turning point in my life when relationships opened up to me and I realized I had been thinking about them in the wrong way. It was my freshman year at college in my Intro To Communications class. We were discussing feelings. How do feeling appear? Can someone make you feel something? Can you make someone feel something? I said that feelings are an expression of the soul and that you can make someone feel something, sometimes it's not what you want, but you can. He said I was wrong. Flat out wrong. I was so set back that my jaw dropped. He told me to think about these two situations:
You are sitting at a coffee house with your friends talking politics... you say something to your best friend and she says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel? Do you take her seriously? Probably not. You are friends, it's what you do.
Now, you are in a clothing store. You turn and accidentally bump in to someone, both of your purchases hit the ground. You start apologising profusely and the guy says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel then? Do you take him seriously? Probably. Because the situations are different, or because you are different?
It's a great idea to ponder, no one can MAKE you feel anything. You ALLOW them to make you feel the way you do. It is fantastically liberating feeling when you can see how you feel and then judge your reactions based on it. No more flying off the handle or letting someone hurt you for no reason. And you can use this to change someone else's life.
Smile and eye contact. The grumpier the person looks on the street, look them right in the eye, give them a sincere smile and say "Good Morning!". They don't have to reply, they don't even have to smile back. But it will get them thinking, and smiles are contagious.
Have A Blessed Day.
Brandy
-Og Mandino
Day in and day out we are bombarded with images that tell us with 'just this' we could be happier, thinner, smarter, sexier, etc. Sometimes we rush out or pick up the phone to by such things. But it is a lie. There is no cream that heals inner hurt. There's no pill that will patch together a broken soul. There is only ourselves.
There was a turning point in my life when relationships opened up to me and I realized I had been thinking about them in the wrong way. It was my freshman year at college in my Intro To Communications class. We were discussing feelings. How do feeling appear? Can someone make you feel something? Can you make someone feel something? I said that feelings are an expression of the soul and that you can make someone feel something, sometimes it's not what you want, but you can. He said I was wrong. Flat out wrong. I was so set back that my jaw dropped. He told me to think about these two situations:
You are sitting at a coffee house with your friends talking politics... you say something to your best friend and she says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel? Do you take her seriously? Probably not. You are friends, it's what you do.
Now, you are in a clothing store. You turn and accidentally bump in to someone, both of your purchases hit the ground. You start apologising profusely and the guy says "Oh, Shut UP!" How do you feel then? Do you take him seriously? Probably. Because the situations are different, or because you are different?
It's a great idea to ponder, no one can MAKE you feel anything. You ALLOW them to make you feel the way you do. It is fantastically liberating feeling when you can see how you feel and then judge your reactions based on it. No more flying off the handle or letting someone hurt you for no reason. And you can use this to change someone else's life.
Smile and eye contact. The grumpier the person looks on the street, look them right in the eye, give them a sincere smile and say "Good Morning!". They don't have to reply, they don't even have to smile back. But it will get them thinking, and smiles are contagious.
Have A Blessed Day.
Brandy
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